So it is officially 2:30 in the morning and I can not sleep. It has been a while since I updated last. Let me update you on what has gone on.
First off, we (my whole family) went to Siesta Key FL. It was an interesting trip, I had a lot of fun but while we were there we found out that my father-in-law almost died. Now I did not want my father-in-law to die, but and I know this sounds bad, he ruined my vacation. It was supposed to be a nice week long beach trip. What it turned into was a 6 day headache. We got the call about 24 hours after we got to FL. Two days later, we almost came home and we actually came home a day early. I didn't get to just chill while we were down there, I was on edge the whole time. Do we come home, is he ok, what is going on. It was not fun at all. Yes there was some good parts, we got to see the ocean, we go to go on a nice boat ride, swim, play in the sand. But the whole trip seemed like a waste and I knew my wife wanted to be home.
I just have some many thing running through my mind right now. My back hurts like a mother fucker, I have a headache, my house is a mess, I feel like my wife is lying to me all the time and pissing away every penny we have, my son is be coming a spoiled little brat. What else..... there are just so many things. The other day I told my boss how much I hate my job. My job seems like such a waste of time, and I am so much better than it. I know I need to work hard, but I just have no motivation. This coming Wednesday I am going to go to a QA meeting and I hope I meet someone who can help me get a new job back in the QA community. I know something will come sometime, but when? How much longer do I have to wait?
What else can I talk about. My wife and I have no money, none, we can hardly pay our bills and it is not going to get better anytime soon. I hope things get better soon. I am a pretty happy guy, but on the inside I am going crazy, don't know what to do@!
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
September 9th
So, last night my father-in-law had a minor stroke or at least that is what we thought it was at first. It turned out that it was bleeding on his brain, which acted like a stroke. He was very disoriented and couldn't move the left side of his body when I got to his house. I met the ambulance at his house and ran inside to see what was going on. We were at the hospital until 1:30 this morning, so I am dragging a little bit this morning.
I know it sounds bad, but my main concern right now is what am I going to do with my boys for day care. I am not sure the wife and I can afford to send them to day care. Who knows what is going to happen, I am a little overwhelmed right now. I guess we will see what happens.
Also, I had an ultrasound done on my liver this morning. I think everything turned out ok, but I am not entirely sure. I guess, again, we will see what happens.
I know it sounds bad, but my main concern right now is what am I going to do with my boys for day care. I am not sure the wife and I can afford to send them to day care. Who knows what is going to happen, I am a little overwhelmed right now. I guess we will see what happens.
Also, I had an ultrasound done on my liver this morning. I think everything turned out ok, but I am not entirely sure. I guess, again, we will see what happens.
Monday, August 24, 2009
August 24th
So it is Monday morning, and I am sitting at my "new" desk on the first floor of NW. I started my new hours this morning, (8:30am to 5pm). I think I am the only one here right now. I know there should be other people here, but I have no idea where they are.
Laura called the internet company this morning, and it looks like we will have internet and a phone again soon. Now I can look for jobs and surf porn in the comfort of my own home. I believe it has been close to 2 year since we have had phone and internet service in the Schwartz household.
Laura called the internet company this morning, and it looks like we will have internet and a phone again soon. Now I can look for jobs and surf porn in the comfort of my own home. I believe it has been close to 2 year since we have had phone and internet service in the Schwartz household.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
May 14th
Well, I guess there is a lot of stuff to update on. First off I will be a father again on June 9th, my wife and I are having a scheduled c-section. It will be interesting with two boys under the age of 3. This is not the way I planned my life at all, but I guess you have to roll with the punches. I am very excited to have another little boy. But this is it, two and done. I love my son, and I am sure my new boy will be great, but I want to be done after two. I think in August (if time permits) I am going to get snipped. My wife on the other hand is not so sure, I think she is holding out hope to have another child. She wants a little girl. Maybe I will look into freezing sperm, but it will depend on the cost. Like I said before, I love kids, but I would like to have some fun. I have found out kids are great, but there is only so many things you can do with them.
I tried to quit chewing, and it lasted for a few days. But, I am stressed out on a regular basis, and chewing tobacco is my out let. It takes my mind off of some of the things that bother. I am going to keep trying. Maybe when the new baby gets here I will try to quit again.
In one of the previous blog posts I talked about a trial my mother was going through. As far as I am told, everything went well, but they won't hear the final answer until September or October. So I am going to be somewhat on edge until then. I don't think my parents are telling me the whole truth. It will be interesting to see what happens.
Right now, I am going through a personal dilemma. I was offered and took a new job with NW. I am not really happy about the position, but I need to put food on the table and with my current position I am afraid I am going to get fired any day. I have been "on the bench" for almost two months now, and it doesn't look like they are going to find anything for me. I am trying to learn as much as I can about software testing, but my mind drifts. I feel like such a waste of space everyday. I come into work, and most of the day I play on the Internet, or play games on my laptop. At the end of everyday I tell myself tomorrow is going to be different. Then I come in, in the morning and waste another day. It is no one's fault but my own. What can I do to motivate myself? I Tell myself to get my sh!t right, but it just doesn't work. Maybe it is the fact that I think I am going to get fired at any minute and I don't want to invest any more time into this position. At the same time, I don't want to get fired. I love my job. I guess I have a few "wishes" right now.
I tried to quit chewing, and it lasted for a few days. But, I am stressed out on a regular basis, and chewing tobacco is my out let. It takes my mind off of some of the things that bother. I am going to keep trying. Maybe when the new baby gets here I will try to quit again.
In one of the previous blog posts I talked about a trial my mother was going through. As far as I am told, everything went well, but they won't hear the final answer until September or October. So I am going to be somewhat on edge until then. I don't think my parents are telling me the whole truth. It will be interesting to see what happens.
Right now, I am going through a personal dilemma. I was offered and took a new job with NW. I am not really happy about the position, but I need to put food on the table and with my current position I am afraid I am going to get fired any day. I have been "on the bench" for almost two months now, and it doesn't look like they are going to find anything for me. I am trying to learn as much as I can about software testing, but my mind drifts. I feel like such a waste of space everyday. I come into work, and most of the day I play on the Internet, or play games on my laptop. At the end of everyday I tell myself tomorrow is going to be different. Then I come in, in the morning and waste another day. It is no one's fault but my own. What can I do to motivate myself? I Tell myself to get my sh!t right, but it just doesn't work. Maybe it is the fact that I think I am going to get fired at any minute and I don't want to invest any more time into this position. At the same time, I don't want to get fired. I love my job. I guess I have a few "wishes" right now.
- "They" find a contract for me.
- I find something else, a better, higher paying job.
- The NW job is something that turns into something better real quick (I don't think this is going to happen).
- I win the lottery, and I don't have to work (I know this won't happen, I don't even play the lottery).
I know everything is going to be ok, I just wish it would speed up and be ok now. I have to stay positive, other wise I will be a wreck.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
April 29th
I talked to both my mother and my sister yesterday, and they told me the trial went well. There are still 2 days left, so I am trying to stay optimistic. Who know what is going to happen.
Last night I decided to go to a career fair downtown. I think it was worth while to an extent. WF was there, and I talked to a woman there who I hope will help me. The woman at Banker's Trust was very rude, I was trying to feel out what position they had available. When I went up to her and did know exactly what I wanted to do, she jumped down my throat. Telling me I need to know what I want, and not make the employer guess. Well, I would do that, but I don't know how I can fit into your organization. It is a little hard to know what I want to do when I don't know what you have.
Another day, another time to read through QC. It is so much fun.
Last night I decided to go to a career fair downtown. I think it was worth while to an extent. WF was there, and I talked to a woman there who I hope will help me. The woman at Banker's Trust was very rude, I was trying to feel out what position they had available. When I went up to her and did know exactly what I wanted to do, she jumped down my throat. Telling me I need to know what I want, and not make the employer guess. Well, I would do that, but I don't know how I can fit into your organization. It is a little hard to know what I want to do when I don't know what you have.
Another day, another time to read through QC. It is so much fun.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
April 28th
Last night I got the pleasure of see a Holocaust survivor speak. The woman's name is Marion Blumenthal Lazan. She is a survivor from Germany, and was in the Bergen-Belsen.I went to watch Marion with my mother, my mother's friends and my older sister. I have seen many survivor speak, been to a few Holocaust memorials/museums. Marion is a very good speaking, what I found interesting about her speech, was how easy it is for her to recite her story. I sure it is because she has told it so many time, I just found it interesting how easy it was for her.
Today is the first day of my mother and step-father's trial. I am interested to find out what happens. I should be receiving a call later today.
I am still working on learning QC. I keep rereading the same thing over and over again. I am not retaining the information, which is very frustrating to me.
I finally made it back into the gym after a 3 week lay off. I need to get in shape, I am tried of being the fat kid.
Today is the first day of my mother and step-father's trial. I am interested to find out what happens. I should be receiving a call later today.
I am still working on learning QC. I keep rereading the same thing over and over again. I am not retaining the information, which is very frustrating to me.
I finally made it back into the gym after a 3 week lay off. I need to get in shape, I am tried of being the fat kid.
Monday, April 27, 2009
April 27th
Nothing too exciting is going on in my life right now. I had another interview last week, and I think it went pretty well. My concern, is I just won't be happy working there. But at the same time, I want a new job because I still think I am going to get fired from my current job at any minute.
My weekend wasn't too exciting. I went over to my sister's house Saturday night with my wife and son, and watched a couple movies. The movies were OK, I think I would have been a woman they would have been more funny to me.
I really need to get back into the gym, but I just have no motivation to get up in the morning and go. I feel like such as lazy fat a$$ right now. I haven't been to the gym in over 3 weeks now, and I think it is really starting to wear on me.
My weekend wasn't too exciting. I went over to my sister's house Saturday night with my wife and son, and watched a couple movies. The movies were OK, I think I would have been a woman they would have been more funny to me.
I really need to get back into the gym, but I just have no motivation to get up in the morning and go. I feel like such as lazy fat a$$ right now. I haven't been to the gym in over 3 weeks now, and I think it is really starting to wear on me.
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